Sunday, January 08, 2006

poopy brooks

WARNING: gross material. not for anyone under 18! seriously gross story! really! also involves drugs, so kids, keep out!
just a short story Maniac Mike told me today. when MM was in prison, in 1980, in Ohio, there was a notorious prisoner there called 'Poopy' Brooks. he was a wretched old, little, bald guy. really gross. he manly kept to himself which was a very good thing. he had a fetish. a really twisted fetish. he was fascinated by shit. feces. crap. he would pay other inmates $10 (good for a sugar packet full of pot) to take a dump on his chest. that's why they called him Poopy. i swear that MM swears it is a true story! everyone knew the story in Ohio. one of MM friends, Steve used to do it for the pot money. MM told him he was fucked in the head for even thinking about doing it. but, Steve was a druggie and needed the drugs.
later, MM was released from prison and after that, so was Steve. MM was in Florida and Steve landed in Sarasota. he called MM, and he went up to Sarasota to hang out for a couple of days and take Steve to the airport because he was going back to Athens, Ohio to hang out with the hippies and druggies. Steve was into acid. when MM dropped Steve at the airport, Steve gave MM a card of acid. MM was not into acid at all, and said no thanks but Steve said hey, just take it. do what you want. thanks.
so, MM puts the envelope of acid in his glove compartment and forgets about it. two months later, he's down at the beach at his favorite bar, The Shamrock, talking to a girl, drinking beer. out of nowhere the girl mentions that she loves acid and would love a hit. MM remembers the acid in the car and goes and gets it. he breaks off a hit and gives it to her and within no time, she is, er, tripping? a few other people find out what's going on and they ask MM for hits and pretty soon, the word goes up and down the beach that some guy in the Shamrock is handing out acid. pretty soon, the place is jamming, people are freakin', dancing topless, laughing and having a tripping good time. MM just drinks his beer and watches, not having taken any himself. Jen, the bar owner, is making money hand over fists, happy as a clam.
later, MM calls Steve, tells him what happened. Steve tells MM that he "dipped" it 3 times, which MM explained to me meant it was strong stuff. for days after, people would walk into the Shamrock, ask for MM but he only had 100 hits and they were all gone that one night.
so, kids, we have learned two things by this story: 1) stay out of prison because you never know what sicko you'll meet and 2) handing out drugs makes you popular. it will also lead to prison when you're caught, and then, like i said, you never know who you might meet in there! it might just be Poopy!

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