the last patron of the night, the very last one, just HAD to be a prick. oh, no, he couldn't have been a nice patron, he had to be a dickhead. i've never seen him before either, nor his two little boys. gee, i wonder if they'll grow up to be pricks, too.
so, the guy (late 30's) steps up to the desk 2 minutes after we should have been shut down and 12 minutes after our internet stations should have been off for the night. he ignored all warnings about getting off the computer and checking out promptly. he asks for his card which we hold at the desk while he used one of our public computer stations. he was on computer G. (side note: our computers are in rows like this...A,G,L,B,C,D,E,M,F and H and I in the back by reference. you must see the logic, right?).
anyway, he had a book he previously checked out. we do not desensitize our books. the security tags set off the alarm in a gate on the way out whether the book has been checked out or not. so, i ask this guy for the book and tell him i will "pass it through".
prick: it's already been checked out.
me: okay. i'll just pass it around.
prick: i said that i already checked it out.
me: I KNOW. but if i don't pass it around the gate, the book will set off the security alarm.
prick: but i already checked it out.
me: (grabs the damn book...slides it around the counter and begins to stamp his 2 DVDs) there. it's all set. i'll check these out.
prick: well, don't you have to run them through a magnet or something so they don't set off the alarm?
me: SIR, see that GATE?? that is the security gate. whatever you take through that gate sets off the alarm. that is why i took your book and placed your DVDs on this (other) side of the counter (you dumbass...get the fuck out of my sight!).
prick: oh. other libraries run their stuff through a desensitizer.
me: yeah, well, each library is different (asswipe).
prick: oh, by the way, computer G has a problem.
me: okay, thanks. goodnight.
prick: well, aren't you gonna do anything about it?
now it is 8 o'clock and checkout should be shut down and i should already be on my way to the backroom to get my stuff so i can leave. he sees that ALL the lights in the building are off, the computers have all been turned off by my coworker and he is the last damn fucker in the place. yeah, i'm gonna stay late and fix the damn computer that worked FINE ALL DAY until you got to it.
me: i will tell the computer tech to look at it in the morning. have a NICE night. (i shut the light off in his face).
why do so many people insist on telling us how to do our job? hey, you wanna work here and become my boss, then go ahead and try. then maybe you can tell me how to do my fucking job. otherwise, shut up and get the hell outta the library. thank you.