cell phones

although we have many signs asking patrons not to bring cell phones into the library or, atleast, to turn them off, patrons bring them in, use them and lose them an awful lot. (if you just left the annoying thing in the car, you wouldn't have lost it).

when a patron loses a cell phone in the library, we do the easiest thing we can do: we let the patron use our phone to call the phone so it will ring, then we can track it down. our library is so small, we can here a phone ring anywhere in the library. we know this because patron's receive numerous calls during the day and we are constantly telling the ignorant fuckers to "take the call in the foyer!". sometimes we have problems. many times, the patron will not know their cell number or on very, very rare occasions, they will have turned the phone off, or placed it on vibrate (although, we have also been able to track down vibrating phones...we are that good).

the absolute best thing that can happen is:

patron *walks up to the desk, shakey and out-of-sorts*: i lost my cell phone!!!!(ohmigod! a crisis!)

circ: yes and....?

patron: can you help me find it?

circ: well, let's call the phone and see if we can track it down by the ringtone. *hands patron phone*

patron *visibly shaking, near tears*: i can't believe i lost my ppphhhhhooooonnnnneeeeeeeee! *sniff, sniff*

patron dials number. we hear a ringtone and IT'S COMING FROM HER GOSHDARN PURSE!

this has happened more times than i can remember, so many times in fact, we no longer need to discuss the dumb patron amongst ourselves. it's old hat.